So, I defended abuse, kept quiet about it, tried desperately to never say a bad word about it…

Then I listened to the pressures of not staying silent and I became a gossip and said more than I should have, which hurt people and broke trust…

Why is it a no-win situation and why do I hate myself for being a blabbermouth when I have made slips before (not always realizing what was said to me was to be completely confidential) and I want to defend myself as being trustworthy when so much of society, if judging my situation, would see me as either being too trustworthy to a point of allowing and enabling toxic behaviors or the opposite end of the spectrum as being a toxi person worthy of revenge/bad Karma/never to trust again?

Ugh…

Double edged sword that I still don’t know how to use other than to do harm to others…including myself…